Mother's Day

[Justice]

when I thought, gee, maybe I should look for a card I really didn't really want to do it. 

My first impulse is to say don't do it if you don't feel like it.  But then part of you does feel like it or you wouldn't have posed the question?

The part of me that likes to stir things up says DO IT.  It's a way of expanding the relationship, bring up something more.  It might be important to consider what you expect in return, if anything.

Ohhhhh.....  I'm glad your husband is so supportive.

[Nina]

Justice, As always when it comes to my mother, I'm confused.  I'd LIKE to have a relationship and a part of me WANTS to stir things up as you say, exactly, and maybe push it to another level.  HOWEVER and it's a BIGGIE...I wonder how much I continue to idealize her because after EVERY encounter, I feel invisible.  Diminished.  Not healthy.  After a LOT of trying to analyze this, it's because she doesn't listen and rarely allows me to talk.  I'm told she's just that way.  I've tried "taking up more space" with her, but pushing back a bit and trying to contribute to the conversation, but she quickly interrupts or changes topics.  So I can have a relationship but I have to resign myself to it being one-sided with me (once again) playing the role of supporter/listener...a role I'm trying to shed in the rest of my life.  That's the conflict.  Sigh.   

[Justice]

Yeah, it doesn't sound like  relationship you would pursue, except for the mother/daughter angle huh?

Ugh.

Take care of yourself and the ones that love you.